I was bullied in high school (Parkview), I got over it. really wasnt that big of a deal. this woman sounds like a wack job. As far as bullying leading to school shootings goes, not even close. You need to have something really really wrong with you mentally to even think about doing something like that. If you are raised right, then the thought will never even run through your head.

Worthy topic perhaps, but Ms. "Blanco" sounds like a bit of a "nut case" (look that up in your DSM4) if you listen to her long enough or follow up on her material. Reading between the lines, making money and getting recognition does not really seem to have quelled her demons, and perhaps that is what the "bullies" were responding to in the first place. We spend all of our adult lives trying to correct the deficiencies of our childhood an youth. Perhaps that is indeed what is designed to give us our motivation and mission in life!
Unfortunately, bullying behavior is hardwired, and while a society may attempt to control and correct it, there is a certain amount of of natural selection mechanism going on here that mirrored throughout nature, and no amount of well-meaning legislation, policies or "counseling" can ultimately correct it. Survival is, after all is said and done, simply a struggle for resources and mating. And while altruism may be occasionally observed, it is the exception in nature rather than the rule. Even the UN can't get Isreal and Palestinians to agree, much less "like" each other--do you really think that an hour lecture by some self-appointed victim-motivational speaker will change kids?

billnewbie, the very site that you, without direct attribution, cited exposes you as a liar. Try all you want to misdirect as you ilk does with "christian" children, but you're out of your element now.

And quit bullying redder, sluggo.

You certainty have your "screed" worked out, don't you Gazettefan. My opinion doesn't agree with yours so you call me a liar. I identify you as the bully you are so you pull out your Pee Wee Herman defense again (I know you are but what am I). And still I don't see anything from you admitting you were wrong about how Darwin never said the phrase "Survival of the fittest". All we get from you is the usual spin atheists put on that fact, that Darwin didn't mean it that way. Darwin said it, you denied it. You were wrong. And now you're trying to bully your way out of admitting you were wrong by redirecting the argument into a debate about what Darwin meant. You would be pitiful if you weren't so arrogant.

billnewbie, and now you want to bully redder for fighting for himself. Which of course puts you on the side of his bullies.

You're saying that when someone fights for himself it's "survival of the fittest" in the godless, atheistic sense? When a christian fights for himself he's being "Darwinian" in your Spencerian thinking?

You don't quite have your screed worked out, do you?

billnewbie, you unwittingly reveal your exposed weakness with the false psychological claim of being bullied. Of course we both know that your current show of weakness comes from a stance of being bested at something you think is your game.

Within my last post was a concession. But your real problem is that I wasn't fooled by your weak effort to misdirect from the important point of what Darwin and Spencer said:

Darwin did not agree with Spencer as to the meaning of natural selection. You lied when you asserted the contrary Those are facts.

What's going on here is deferred payback on your part for having to answer test questions in college with something other than "god did it." It must have been rough for you to actually state answers that required thinking back then. Probably the true source of your sense of being bullied. Sorry, but you can't get revenge on your teachers here.

Again. you abide by an ideology in which bullying children is intrinsic. Look inward, if you dare.

So then, Redder, you are saying that it's a good thing to bully the bullies? Turnabout is fair play? "Do unto others as they did unto you"? So you really do embrace the concept of "Survival of the fittest" as long as the right people survive and the right ones are fittest. I'm having a hard time telling the difference between you and the bullies you made sure "got theirs", even to this day.

now they call me for jobs...LOL...NOT HAPPENIN

I was the fat red head kid in school by the way...until 7th grade when I grew to 5'9" and 140lbs and solid from all of the football I played....bullies didnt grow that quick..they got theirs

anyone see the story on the "Today Show" this morning when a Dad went on the bus and chewed out the kids who were bullying others...he got in trouble but HATS OFF TO YOU MAN!!!! He was 100% correct in what he did

"What you did is disgusting. If you had any sense of decency you'd be ashamed." Spoken like a true bully, Gazettefan. You could learn a lot from Ms. Blanco.

That seems to be the point of bullying, to put others to shame. The bullies always seem to find ways to make their targets responsible for the bullying they receive. In the eyes f the bullies, the bullied deserve the scorn they receive.

No Gazettefan I am not ashamed for having posted things you won't agree with, no matter how many times you try to shame me for your own entertainment.

I noticed you didn't retract your statement that Darwin never said the phrase "Survival of the fittest". Did you see just how many sources there were for that fact, aside from the Wikipedia one you mentioned? You made a statement that was historically false. As usual, you stated your opinion as if it were fact. You are now trying to obscure that fact with yet more opinions stated as fact based on what you read in Wikipedia (which you have no problem with when you do it but when you think that I did it, it's somehow shameful). You certainly do use flexible arguments don't you? But one of your biggest problems continues to be your propensity to state your opinions as if they were established fact. That's a problem you need to work on. Then there's that problem you have that leads you to believe that folks that disagree with you are displaying ignorance, and that those who display ignorance deserve to be scorned. You're a bully, Gazettefan. You need to do something about that. But I suspect you have too much fun being a bully. I have only the slightest hope that you can change.

Well, billnewbie, your skimming of a Wikipedia article would have you appear to be correct in substance, but let's have a closer look. A true reading of that article shows that you deliberately chose to not cite a statement from it that totally contradicts your lie that Darwin used Spencer's term synonymously:
--
"Darwin meant it as a metaphor for 'better adapted for immediate, local environment', not the common inference of 'in the best physical shape' [4]. Hence, it is not a scientific description,[5] and is both incomplete and misleading."
--

So it "seems," billnewbie, that your calculated "research" only reveals that Darwin did not use the term in a Spencerian sense. Meaning he did not use it as a synonym for what Spencer said.

And if you, billnewbie, are so obviously devious enough to perpetrate your lie here, where you and your lie are so easily exposed, it's easy to see how you can abide by an ideology that exploits and manipulates yet to be educated children and other uneducated people.

What you did is disgusting. If you had any sense of decency you'd be ashamed.

"Survival of the fittest" is a phrase that was coined by a man named Herbert Spencer who came up with it after he read Charles Darin's "Origin of the Species". Darwin himself included the phrase as a synonym for "Natural Selection" in his 5th edition of "Origin of the Species". Many reference sources refer to the concept of "Natural selection" and "Survival of the Fittest" interchangeably. So it seems that Darwin did indeed say "Survival of the fittest" in spite of Gazettefan's vigorous denial. If Gazettefan is so obviously wrong about something he so closely embraces and admires, Charles Darwin's theories, can we really trust Gazettefan's judgment about the things he hates and twists to suit himself, like religion and Christianity? Obviously not.

You're quite right, Totellthetruth, our schools do seem to teach a paradox. They try to teach our kids to be good for goodness' sake but then they also tell them that they are animals without souls. The students are apt to quickly realize that the good are easily exploited and that being good is a disadvantage in this dog eat dog world of ours. The golden rule of natural selection is "do unto others before they can do unto you". Only religion offers any reason to oppose that self-serving philosophy which so obviously the natural result of teaching "Natural Selection".

Sorry, totellthetruth, false equivalences are not the cause for bullying. If anything, the source is most likely in the home. Your explanation provides an excuse not a cause for bullying.

Though teachers and administrations do have the responsibility to determine if bullying is actually taking place -including when the victim fights back -they shouldn't be allowed to take the easy way out by just calling it a fight.

My oldest son was Bullied he entire middle school years.(at Marshall) His gym locker was broke into on a daily bases and his gym clothes were thrown in the toilet. Finely the teacher let him put his stuff in his office which made things worse as he was branded a teachers pet and a brown noser. He was harassed because he was interested in History. He was not a "Jock" but still tried all sports, he found his sport not a main line School Sport but outside of the box, he raced bicycles Kids made fun of that. When I reported all of this to the principals office I was told by the assistant principal. "Oh he needs to get a thicker skin. BOYS WILL BE BOYS" Nothing was ever done and he just lived with it not telling me. Until he came home the last day of school (8th grade) and said "If you don't get me transfered to Parker, I will quit, I can't go to school with a bunch of A***HOLES" He graduated from Parker at the top of his class and served 4 years in the U.S. Navy and now in school majoring in History. He wants to be a teacher and a coach. OBTW his bully was the son of a principal and he could get away with it!

gazettefan, of course you are right, you always are! LOL! But (In my best EYSTER voice) IS NOT HOW THE SCHOOLS TEACH IT.. We are teaching our kids to be bullies by how the teachers and adminstration acts. Think about the teachers union, they bully the administrators to get their own way. Think about the administration, they bully the people to get more money. The cycle of bullying starts with the highest and goes down. Children learn it from the schools and until the administrators and the teachers either quit or learn how to be a good Christian role model the bullying will continue.

By the way, totellthe"truth," take note of the god-sponsored and god-dictated violence in the bible. Much of it against children and babies.

I did not miss her point and I was AT THE program JaNeSviLLean - You missed my point. Best for you to go to any one of the many sites dedicated to those that were killed / injured / wounded at Columbine and LOOK at the faces of those people. She may feel those feelings, but I did not agree with how it was used with Columbine - I guess you don't get it.

totellthe"truth," you are wrong: Darwin never said "survival of the fittest." In fact, an extension of Darwin's thinking shows that cooperation is an adaptive characteristic within the human species.

The golden rule predates the bible and also exists outside of christianity.

The golden rule is a phenomenon of biological and cultural evolution.

frusion, the problem then becomes what to tell your kid to do when the teacher and adults in charge decide to do nothing about it, over and over and over again. Then when they escalate the situations by punishing the victim for walking away, when they were suppose to "waiting in line", or running in the hall to get away.

The worst bullying I encountered in school was from the teachers, and then the students followed suit. The cycle continues even know as teachers personal interests and disagreements with parents turn into public humiliation. The children continue this in the classroom and outside of the classroom.
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On a different note, remember that bullying is tied to Darwin's survival of the fittest, so if you teach evolution in the school, you have to deal with the consequences of what you are teaching. You cannot teach love and kindness and survival of the species in the same classroom.

No bull about it it happens.

justmy414, you are correct. Fighting back has the same punishment as the person that started the fight. If you are getting picked on or even hit, you are suppose to find a teacher and not hit back.

yada, you missed her point entirely.

Sympathy for Columbine's killers is the one part of her speech that is in poor taste. I understand her message and all the things she went through, but she needs to leave that comment out of her future presentations. If my memory is correct, 13 people were murdered and more than 20 were wounded.

Our daughter who is now 23 and about to graduate from college with a teaching degree was bullied while in high school. I do agree with the advice of "instead of focusing on school officials or parents of the bullies, a parents first actions should be to help their child". We went the route of going through the "right channels" and got absolutely nowhere. She was having panic attacks, not wanting to go to school and the list goes on. So we as her parents decided to help her and take her to counseling. That was the smartest thing we could've done for her. It changed her forever! To this day she doesn't take any crap from anybody at anytime for anything. She is not a bystander when it comes to someone being bullied either. Just remember that if you as a parent don't watch out for your child.....noone will!!!

Adults can be almost as bad as kids? That's a ridiculous statement JMO. Where do the kids learn it from? Some people never grow up and out of being the bully.

Even if you feel nothing will be done, or hasn't been done in the past when bullying is reported, do it anyway. It establishes a record so eventually this pattern of abusive behavior will be too lengthy to ignore or pass off as harmless.

I was rooting for her until the "I'm cool right? You guys love me" part. Huh? Her credibility dipped to "pathetic". I agree, more therapy is needed if she still desperately seeks approval now as an adult from those who made her teen years a living hell.

Bullying also occurs in the workplace - right here in Rock Co.
The 5 top reasons individuals are targeted for bullying are: (1) refusal to be subservient (being independent), (2) being more technically skilled than the bully, (3) being liked by co-workers/customers (being the go-to expert), (4) being ethical and honest, and (5) not being sufficiently political. Thus, people are targeted for their strengths and the threats they pose to the defensive, narcissistic perpetrator.
Workplace bullies often try to spread the word that your are not doing your job well and will even go as far as to report the smallest infraction.

I didn't have a CLUE at 12 years old, how to make the "popular kids" stop the harassment. THIS was in the late sixties!
My daughters had "some" issues, but I think they managed to skate most of the bullying by simply being in a smaller school district.
My grandchildren are now in the Janesville schools... The oldest will be fine. She has a strong sense of independence, and a soft heart for those less fortunate. She was the child that befriended the handicapped and impaired. She says, they're just like us and want the same things but they were born with "extra stuff".

2nd grandchild is our boy! He has some of his own little "issues" but he has a solid family structure and his parents are very involved in his life.

Just tonight though, I drove into Milton from work.. saw a garage sale sign.. headed down the side road... 4 teenage boys crossed in front of my car and yelled at me about why I was at the same intersection... 16 year old punks... threatened me... I was intimated by 4 snot-nosed brats with their shave heads and tattoos... I expect these snots will be in the paper soon!

Their parents must be SOOO proud!

No telling them to stop doesn't work, and punching them now gets kids suspended and expelled from school. I have spend several years teaching my child how to be a "good victim" since the school will not stop the bullying and diciplines harshly for fighting back.

I was bullied a fair amount as a kid. Finally, one day I felt "empowered" enough to blacken the bully's eye. Perhaps not surprisingly, I wasn't picked on much after that.

Much of this stuff Blanco shares, based on the article here, is nothing more than New Agey, Cracker Jack box psychology garbage.

"She has occasional anxiety attacks so bad that she will pull out her checkbook to remind herself that this is 2010, not 1990. Or she’ll call one of those former-bullies-now-friends just to be reassured: “I’m cool, right? You guys love me now, right?”"

Sounds to me like she needs more therapy. The fact that she's an adult now just hasn't quite sunk in?

If a child is being bullied, by all means tell a teacher and a parent. But, at the same time, don't cower in fear. Stand up for yourself. Bullies are nothing but cowards at heart. They cover up their cowardice with false bravado. If you show them you're not an easy target, they quickly move on. Just telling them to stop doesn't often work.

There is no bullying at that school? Give me a break, not only are you as a person acknowledged largely on how much money your parents make, there is also favoritism, bullying and judgmental teachers.