I know it does not say it in the article, but I have to wonder was this clown drunk?

First off, its a felony to assault an officer. Punch, kick, bite... and yes, even grab various body parts - enjoy your arrest record, being drunk doesn't excuse it.

Second off, (karenjis41) it's a body part not a swear word. The groin is an area of the male human body that refers to the testicles and penis. Shesh, get over it.

Every knows that stoners are more into polymorphic perversity than drunks are.

By George I think he's got it!

I bet you the headlines "grabbed" your attention!

That's just plain NUTS

Sounds like he was drunk... Haardly worth a felony...

Hey, thekid, the headline implies that the assailant had at least a half a joint in his hand.

believe me, i am well aware of the ignorant peeps out there. my point is cuz the 'eviler of two evils' is legal, well never know but if he had pot on him then it would state in the article that he was in possession of marijuana, and the uninformed would assume. as i said, i may be wrong, but if you had to put a wager on sober or drunk.....

Oh Mooshoo, those were great! I was in a crabby mood until I read those. Thank you!

Thanks for the good laugh mooshoo those headlines are awesome!!!!!

Hey thekid3477, maybe you and I would have to be drunk to do something stupid like this but not everyone has our keen sense of morality.

Hey, Kid: I didn't assume the guy had any type of substance in him. Some guys are just jerks and act this way.

For those offended by the headline, here are several alternatives:

Officer Suffers Groin Pull in Meelee
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Alleged Felony Squeezer put in the Freezer
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Hard Time for Groin Crime
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Madison Police Officer Taken Out on a Squeeze Play
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Suspect Nabs Cop

This thread reminds me of the joke about a cub reporter covering a story about a sexual assault on a nurse by an escapee from a mental institution. He returned with the story and the headline of "Violent Tragedy Ensues at Insane Asylum".
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The editor told the reporter the headline was too vague to grab the readers attention and asked the reporter to rewrite it. The reporter thought for a few mintes and submitted the headline: "Staff Nurse Assaulted, Mental Patient Escapes".
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The editor told him the headline was too long for the larger font the paper uses and asked him to shorten it up. The reporter came back shortly with "Nut Screws and Bolts".

And I have no doubt that obscenities were expressed.

Would you have preferred the the headline to be more specific?

the sad part of this story in my eyes is that its probably safe to assume the guy was drunk. but it says nothing about alcohol in this article cuz its legal to drink. maybe im wrong, but i doubt it. now if this guy had half a joint in his pocket it would say that he was also arrested/ticketed for possession of marijuana and all the uninformed people would assume that its the drugs fault when actually its the alcohol thats the problem. 21st century reefer madness.

jeez. people whine and cry if the gazette doesnt put in enough info, now youre whining that they put in the facts. give me a break.

owwwwwwwweeeeeee

Couldn't there have been a better word to use in the headline for this story? Maybe man accused of obsenity against officer or something? This is a headline that belongs on the cover of the "Enquirer"